Mates, again, sex and sexual health is a very interesting and important issues that always raise in the topic of discussion. Sex is never really sex without the big “O”. No matter how you look at it, it you did not went over and beyond, you might as well stay at the bottom and forget climbing up.
Sex is like climbing a big mountain where there is nowhere else to go but the top. Other than the top, everything else is just a way or a path to getting there. And in that big mountain of intense pleasure, the top is the Big “O”, the orgasm.
When your having difficulty achieving this, you are handicapped in this particular mountain. It is called Orgasm Difficulty and it is the inability for you to achieve the peak of climax or the highest point of sexual excitement in a sexual activity. Its like an unending roll down the hill or simply rolling in an endless plain. Nothing too exciting there. But then again, that’s not a problem if it cannot be solved.
There are many factors to orgasm difficulty which can be attributed to physical or psychological causes. For example, a woman's incapability to achieve orgasm may be just a matter of deluding oneself. This is one of the most prevalent reasons for this problem, the “mind over matter” thing. This is usually caused by a preoccupation of the orgasmic response or some insecurity o some sort. Sometimes, looking too much at our goal, the top, makes us trip at the path. Likewise, too much concentration on getting orgasm is self-defeating. This will only lead to frustration as high levels of anxiety are created and anxiety itself interferes with sex. Therefore, stimulation, arousal, and sexual play must be freely done without having to pin too much energy on an end-goal in mind.
On the other hand, Orgasm Difficulty can also be attributed to something physical. In the United States alone, there is an estimated number of between 40 - 50 million women who are reportedly experiencing sexual dysfunction. Sexual dysfunction in a woman refers to a lowered sexual libido as well as the inability to have an orgasm. According to the Journal of the American Medical Association (1999), there is an estimated 43% of women who suffer from female sexual dysfunction.
A cause to this dysfunction might be done by damage to the nerves of the sexual organs. When there are already damages in these sensitive areas, it is very easy to have orgasmic difficulty. By then, there is lack of nervous response which lower the stimuli that is required to achieve the sought after orgasm. This nervous damage can be the result of a careless intercourse without sufficient lubrication. Careless use of sex toys like high intensity vibrators can also cause damage to these sensitive nerves.
Lastly, hormones can also be directly responsible for a decrease in female sex drive and libido. The hormonal imbalance can result in a difficulty for arousal as well as a lack of sexual urge. This diminished libido is merely a prelude to a difficulty in becoming aroused and ultimately climaxing.
Speaking of libido, an increased arousal will give you better chances of getting an orgasm. To get that libido, you might want to steer clear from alcohol. Taken as a "social lubricant," people drink for a lot of reasons, sometime to feel sexy, reduce anxiety, gain self-confidence, and just start the ball rolling toward home court. However, alcohol is actually a depressant, which might only give you a harder time to get it on. As the porter in the famous Shakespeare's Macbeth had observed, alcohol merely "provokes the desire, but it takes away the performance."